I had a sleepover at Miss 1wRong’s place on Good Friday.
And I had a lot of fun.
Which made me think we should start an SDU: Singlehood Delights Union or something along that line. (Spasticated Division for the Unmarried?)
It could start off something like this:
And here’s a guide on having a successful singles date… with yourself or the sex you’re uninterested in!
4pm: Have a delightful time performing biological reconstruction on your delicious tea time snacks. Turn that smiling cookie into a koala, a bear, a bird! Or if you’re sick in the mind, you can try to create a pig with pendulous breasts and flapping boards for wings.
9pm: Catch the savage man-eating rabbit which lurks in the dark caverns of the bedroom toilet. Miss 1wRong managed to snap a photo of it close-up while it was digesting its hapless prey.
11pm: Be beautiful and get your photos taken for our trendy fashion magazine where we share our unique beauty secrets which will guarantee your life-time singlehood. Men will fall for you (to their deaths from the windows of the HDB flats) when they lay their eyes on your loveliness. Here are 2 issues which we have published.
And here’s what the men say when they met our models of the year…
Mr $7.50 a.k.a. Chee Kok Pek: “Wah piang, when I see this woman ah, really woman anot?! Just thinking of booking a room at hotel 18 (which I do regularly with my CPF money) with her, I want to castrate myself siah! ”
The late Astronaut William Ren ONG:”After getting to know that model on the magazine, I figured if I try to breath vacuum, my suffering would end quicker.”
If you join our Singles Delight Union, you can enjoy a movie pass to watch our own movie production directed by Cameron Weiss Richards and produced by Kevin Watanabe Tamade. Here’s a screenshot of the movie ‘Cannot give a F**k’ (rated Extreme Violence and Mental Retardation)